Excuses.

I love a good cup of coffee. I do, really. But after a tell you what I am about to tell you, you might not believe me. Or think I am a poser. (Do people still say that?) 

For one of my bridal showers, I received an espresso maker. I loved it instantly. This was over a year ago. I now have been married almost ten months. And here it is: I have never used it. I haven't even tried to learn. So pathetic.

I told the woman who got it for me how totally THRILLED I was. I was going to have her over. Shower her with espresso-based drinks. Hasn't happened. But I HAVE been going to Starbucks, paying $4.15 for a latte or mocha that I can make at home if I only learned how.

One time, HeyBrother even read the manual and told me how to do it, but I had just woken up from napping and wasn't really listening, so I didn't retain any of the information. See, more excuses. 

Why didn't you just read the manual and figure it out yourself?

Good question, to which, I WOULD answer that I am a visual learner and need pictures or a demonstration of someone showing me. Ok, seriously who is this lame? Someone spent $60 on this machine and I NEED to learn how to use it. Do you know what I would do for an extra $60 these days. I would give your dog a bath and brush it's teeth. And wash your windows. And do your laundry. And would even iron. And I HATE ironing.

ok, no more excuses.